The Joys of JO
A Wankin Warrior Speaks
shied away from anal
felt out of step
deep-rooted pleasure of jacking
two hearts, two bodies, two cocks
a warrior too
purest and truest form of homosex
Hey cockrubbin dick2dick and wankin dudes,
These are two very eloquent emails that came to me from Warrior Doug. In them, he talks about both the primacy of JO in his life and the pleasures he's found in cockrub. I think you'll see the commonalities very plainly.
I'm a 62-year old gay male who just recently stumbled upon your club for those who are into frottage, Cockrub Warriors. What a delightful and delicious discovery! I have just, tonight, read your "introduction" (Hyacinthine Love) to the site and cannot sleep without letting you know how much I appreciated your experience and your account.
Like you, from as far back in my gay life as I can remember, I shied away from anal sex. Like you, I have dabbled in it upon demand -- both passively and actively -- but always to the tune of little enjoyment or satisfaction. I didn't rebel against the rest of gay society or even harbor ill-will for their anal-oriented fixations. Alas, I simply felt I was out of step and marching to a different, and lonely, drummer.
At an early age, I discovered the joy and pleasure of masturbation and that joy has never left me. To this day, despite some medical obstacles, I continue to enjoy, in my mind at least, the deep-rooted pleasure of jacking -- by myself or with others, in person or on the phone. It has often been a lonely practice, but always satisfying. I've been fortunate to have found many others, including two long-term lovers, who enjoyed it as much as I, and for that I've been most grateful.
But what about cock-rubbing? I read of your experiences -- along with some of the stories on the web site -- and I have felt my body and soul responding with a resounding, "Yes!!!" The beauty of the meeting of two hearts, two bodies, and two cocks is indescribable, yet you have managed to capture it. While masturbation will continue to be my preferred form of sexual expression -- and with the right person and environment, coupled with the right techniques, it can be equally ecstatic and moving -- I will, nevertheless, always hold a special place in my heart for the gentle (and frenzied!) sensations and significance of frottage.
When I think back over my sexual experiences -- some fifty years of them! -- what do I remember most vividly? Not a circle-jerk; not a night of edging and ejaculating; not even a night of masturbatory bliss with a lover. No, the experience that is most vivid in my mind, and remembered with the most intense pleasure, was a night in a gay bath when I was about 27 years old. It was a night with a person I barely remember, but yet whose body and cock rubbed against mine for about 6 hours in a way I can never forget! I doubt if either of us felt the mystical and magical bond that you've described, but we replaced that with poppers and lost ourselves in our pleasures. I can assure you the experience was VERY powerful!! I still recall the straining, the "pushing," the grinding, the panting, and, yes, the gentle rubbing -- lost in the sensations and the power of our bodies. It was an experience that has never faded from my mind. A memory I will carry with me with barely-diminished pleasure through my remaining years.
I thank you for rekindling so vividly these thoughts. How fortunate you were to have had Brett for the time you did -- what a beautiful, precious, touching, and exciting meeting of spirits, bodies -- and cocks!
After I wrote to you last night, I spent considerable time reading the many entries in Warriors Speak. I was both touched and amazed at the various accounts there -- "touched" because I shared many of the emotions the warriors had experienced over the years and "amazed", in many cases, because of the kindred spirit I felt. I hadn't quite expected that.
While I may not be into frottage to the extent that you and the others are, I can still identify with where you're all coming from in essence. As I said earlier, I'm primarily into masturbation -- with a few incredible memories of fully-body cock-rubbing over the years. I'm very familiar with the response that all of you have received -- "Is that ALL you want to do?" I can't tell you the hurt and rejection I've felt, simply because I found such excitement in an act that everyone else considered to be a substitute for "the real thing." Yes, I identify with all of you and consider myself something of a warrior, too. I am honored that you would accept me into your ranks. And my heart and memories go with you all.
Of course, I'd be pleased if you were to use my e-mail in Warriors Speak. What an honor to be included with those who have written so simply, yet eloquently, of their experiences. I would whole-heartedly join you in any effort to debunk the myth that anal and oral sex are the ONLY ways to express our sexual longings and desires. I agree with you, even in the face of my love of jacking, that cock-rubbing and FULL body contact between men is the purest and truest form of homosex . . . the sharing and giving of our male bodies in their entirety, reveling in the experience of melding with another man, body and spirit, passionately and fully.
Thanks, Bill, for your kind words, your great efforts, and your true understanding.
Yours in pleasure and peace,
P.S. If you use my e-mail in "Warriors Speak", please feel free to include my e-mail address. I would be honored and thrilled to hear from and possibly correspond with other warriors.
A Note from Bill:
Readin Warrior Doug's words reminded me of my lover Brett's observation about the New York Jacks that "I found God in a roomful of 200 naked men."
The New York Jacks was, as I mention in Hyacinthine Love, a membership club set up expressly for guys who liked JO and who didn't like anal. The reason you could find God there was that attitude wasn't allowed. Specifically, you couldn't reject another Jack. If you did, you were out.
What that meant in practice was that you could relax. Men respected scenes that were clearly private. But if you wanted to touch another guy's dick, you could, and he could touch yours - regardless of age, shape, or race.
That made life a lot simpler. It also led to comradeship and bonds among members. You stopped worrying about whether you - or your partner - was attractive enough, and started concentrating on the important thing - fun with cock, yours and others'.
After we moved to SF, Brett and I trained in Tantric and Taoist erotic massage at Oakland's Body Electric school, where, as at the Jacks, workshops and classes were organized on the non-rejection system. Joe Kramer, the founder of Body Electric, was crystal clear about the relationship between sexuality and spirituality, and studying with Joe was a confirmation of my long-held belief that cock is holy, dick divine, the phallus sacred.
In general, throughout my life I've searched for and believed in bonding, spirituality, and comradeship thru M2M sex. JO and phallus-to-phallus are clearly where it's at if those are your goals. Anal is too hierarchic and too disjointed. It's very American in that sense -- sex without connection or pleasure -- very Puritan -- the American-individualist-Dream gone completely sour.
But us dudes into frot know that cockrub, dick2dick, bone on bone and JO too are as fresh, pure, innocent, natural, and holy as ur first boy's jizz with ur best boy's friend.
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