Dave Smith

For life and love

1-14-2008

I have just discovered the Man2Man Alliance site and the discussion on frot. I am amazed, but hardly surprised - amazed that I hadn't found you before and delighted to have finally caught up with soulmates and fellow cock warriors. I am not surprised however - I have found all sorts of things on the web that I am no longer surprised by anything that turns up on the internet.

My story: I was born in New Zealand, but have lived in Australia since I was 9 years old. I have been gay since I was a teenager. But growing up in a conservative society, and at a conservative time (mid 70s) being openly gay was not an option. So I did what everyone told me I had to do - got married. Besides, I thought it would fix the problem. Well as we all know, it didn't and still doesn't fix any problems, but only makes them worse. I found penetrative sex (straight in this case) distasteful and fantasised about gay sex instead. Except that it was never penetrative gay sex I wanted - just a mate to hug and hold and get off with. I didn't know the word frot existed.

I came out nearly 2 years ago, and I am now happily single again. However, during my years in the closet, I had a succession of fleeting gay experiences. Most of the time, I could resist the pressure and avoided anal sex - I didn't like it. For one thing, I didn't want to catch anything nasty, even with a condom, and for another, I always saw anal sex as demeaning to the bottom - in some way I saw that a good man was having to act like a woman. Or, at the very least, was in some way inferior to me. When I have sex with a man, I don't want anyone being inferior to me. I want to have sex with an equal. I want to have sex with a man, not someone pretending to be a woman. I have been there already, and didn't like it then and still don't now. Fortunately for me, most of the guys I met during that time were willing to go along with my request. A couple of times guys turned me down flat when I suggested it, but then, I wouldn't have been happy with them anyway. And something else always turned up!

I have never been a bottom and do not know what it is to take it, but I have given it on a half dozen or so occasions, reluctantly and only under pressure from which ever partner I happened to be with. But mostly, despite their pleas to the contrary, I managed to just get along with cock to cock action, the way I like it. There is nothing like hot sweaty bodies wrapped around each other, face to face, chest to chest, cock to cock. The best thing about that kind of sex is that you can look into your partner's eyes and see his passion and enthusiasm for life and love. And that is no more evident than at the moment of climax. Pure bonding. Sheer excitment. Deep passion. Ultimate relationship.

I first heard the term frottage from someone several years ago, although because of the oddness of the name, I didn't associate the word with what I liked in sexual experiences. But now, thanks to your website, I now know what I have unconciously realized all along - that frot is indeed what I have always liked. I am delighted to have a name for it now.

The best news is that I recently have met someone who is also into frot just as much as me. We have been dating steadily for several months and we are in love. He doesn't like anal sex at all, and since I don't either, we are ideal partners. I hope it all works out - I will keep you in touch.

I would be delighted to be a fellow warrior in the Man2Man Alliance.

Cheers

Dave

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